November 2004
Cultivating an Attitude of Gratitude

Do children learn the deeper meaning of or develop a sense of gratitude simply by being told to say “thank you”? What are the best ways to help children experience the heart-expanding effects of gratitude?

Children assimilate what they experience in their immediate world. Perhaps all we, as adult models for children, need to BE is thankful out loud. Instead of forcing an unauthentic expression of thankfulness, allow children to see, hear, feel and experience your gratitude, generosity and kindness in your interactions with life.

In all my years of teaching, I never once asked, told or insisted a child say “please” or “thank you”. I just modeled, modeled, modeled in all my actions and words, all my interactions. Within a short time, children, even those with language delays, were expressing gratitude in a multitude of ways, not simply with their words, but primarily in their acts of kindness among each other and with me.

So, where do you start? Express gratitude and appreciation at every opportunity. Say thank you to the cashier or individual who bags your groceries, wave to the driver who created space allowing you to squeeze into traffic, smile at the kindness of someone holding the door open for you, hug a friend just for listening, acknowledge a waitress or waiter by remembering their name and using it in all your communications. Comment on the many blessings of your life, home and community: “I am grateful for the comforts of our home”, “I am so blessed to be alive and healthy”, “I love our community as I feel safe living here”, etc. The list is infinite. Whether alone or in the company of children, develop the habitude (habit and attitude) of gratitude.

Most importantly, show deep gratitude and appreciation to and for your children/students and family. Whenever possible, include a brief description of his/her contribution to your life, how their kindness positively affected you. Be real, be authentic, be present, be YOU. The rest is easy. Examples:

“I really had fun with you at the zoo today.”
“I appreciate you and your sister getting along so well in the car. We accomplished all our errands more quickly and easily.”
“It was such a joy walking the dog with you”.
”Thanks for clearing the table so quickly. I appreciate your extra effort”.
”I enjoy hearing about your friendships”.
”This chore was made more fun just because it was done with you.”
“I love snuggling next to you when we read books together”.

Remember, children become what they absorb around them. What are your children or students absorbing from you? God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say "thank you?"

William A. Ward

Happy Thanksgiving!
An abundance of gratitude and blessings,
Adrian Reznik

Nurture a Child “Nuggets”
Creating a year-round THANKSGIVING spot. Find a convenient, safe place for establishing a home altar of sorts. It may be the refrigerator door, a bulletin board, small table or shelf. Make this a special place for things you are thankful for: pictures of people you love, souvenirs and memorabilia, handmade treasures, and, of course, children’s artwork. Invite your family members to add their own items. Be sure to set aside time routinely for you to gather together to share stories, memories and feelings about the objects and pictures.

What is your heart’s desire? If you were to be blessed with resources to support you as an educator or parent, what would it look like? What problems or challenges are you facing and what support would you like to receive? What information would be beneficial for your particular situation? Allow your ideas, even your crazy, wild ideas to flow. Don’t edit. Share what would be most helpful to you. Your responses will contribute to the evolution and transformation of the web site. Send your creative thoughts to Adrian@nurtureachild.com All responses are deeply, deeply appreciated.

Copyright © 2004 Adrian Reznik