April 12, 2007
THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE

"This is a great day...This is THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE," loudly proclaimed eight-year-old Sean while the students were finishing mundane tasks at the end of the day. I promptly glanced over at Sean during his
profound announcement. We made brief eye contact. The fresh, bright sparkle in Sean's eyes and the smile in my heart merged. The joy of consciously connecting with one's pure potentiality is beyond measure and description. Sean was declaring it as his BEST DAY ever.

On a recent assignment in a 2nd grade class, I was quickly made aware of Sean's presence. It seemed as if I instantly became his research project: how many interruptions before the teacher will explode and send me out of the room, what is her breaking/boiling point, which buttons can I push to be acknowledged in a customary
way (punishment, name on the board, and loss of recess were daily routines), and will you love me no matter what? Even Sean's interactions with peers were rough, quarrelsome, and sometimes harmful. The students' reactions of exclusion combined with their comment, "He's always like that," concerned me. Throughout the
day, several administrators stopped by to see if Sean was compliant.

I've encountered numerous "Seans" (male and female, of all ages) in my profession, even had classrooms full of "Seans" having taught special education for many years - often the dumping ground for "Seans". I am convinced that as the unique needs of children evolve and the constraints of education tighten, more and more "Seans" are making themselves visible in the classroom.

There are times when my mind and heart wrestle with each other and I give way to my judgmental thoughts. That's what happened first. My list of "shoulds" popped up - Sean should: pay attention, listen when I speak,
be more respectful, stop interrupting, be interested, make my life easier, stop arguing, follow rules/directions, cease being annoying, quit interfering with the learning of others, behave, etc. etc. etc. Ha! Fantasy land!

And then, personal inquiry kicked in. I internally questioned each "should" spinning in my mind with "Is that really true?" Each reply was: No, No, No, No, No…Following that process, I took a few deep breaths, closed
my eyes for a moment and immediately heard the whispers of my heart speak, "love anyway." Three more
times, the same gentle message repeated, increasing in volume until I was ultimately drawn to rise above my perceptions and follow my heart's paved pathway. LOVE ANYWAY!

Now I was present to meet and greet all of Sean with the breadth of my heart. No matter what stategies Sean chose, the opened levees of my heart allowed only loving waves of thought and action to ensue. Now I was able to connect with Sean through compassion, kindness, patience, creativity and inquiry, the same as I would with
a beloved friend. These are some of the questions we explored together:

What do think would work best for you and ___ to be able to _____?
What did you hear ____ say?
Would you be willing to tell us what that feels like?
What would you like to do about this situation?
When you do ____, how do think that affect others? How does it affect you?
What are some ways to respond to ___?
How would you like to handle this?
Would you be willing to ___? If not, what would you suggest instead?
What might you do differently next time now that you know what you know?
There are many different ways to see something. What did you see?

Sean was quick to respond to several of these inquiries with recommendations for removal, humiliation and exclusion - a common and known pattern. I commented that those seemed like harsh responses and wondered
if he/we could think of other solutions. He breathed a sigh of relief and relaxed. It took a considerable number of incidents before Sean began to trust that he wouldn't be punished or blamed or labeled, understood our partnership's intention was to seek and find peaceful alternatives to conflicts, and relate to himself and others more harmoniously. It wasn't long before Sean's tough facade started to melt.

That afternoon, Sean experienced recess - a rare occasion. Once on the playground, Sean wanted to play with Kenny and Nicholas yet both boys wouldn't have much to do with him. Kenny and Nicholas asked for my assistance. I listened to their story about wanting the girls to chase them and how Sean was "getting in the way". Sean expressed that he was protecting the boys from the girls and thought that's what they wanted. Once everybody heard and understood each other I asked what they'd like to do next. Kenny and Nicholas were leery of Sean's involvement yet agreed to include him. Within a few short minutes, the three boys had their arms around each other and enthusiastically played together the entire recess, WITHOUT the girls. Companionship and connections were instantaneously developed. Sean was high as a kite. His smile and joy shone like
bursting rays of sunshine.

After we returned to the classroom, Sean maintained his inner bliss for the rest of the day. He merrily worked on assignments that most students resisted or avoided. His interactions with peers were positive and fun. This is when Sean publicly announced and claimed his BEST DAY.

Our inherent worth cannot be damaged or stolen by life's harshness. Our intrinsic identity and worth are absolute, deeply imprinted in the soul, a divine spirit of eternal value. Yet this truth can be easily forgotten when layers of criticism, condemnation and external influences barricade the window to our soul.

No lessons in reading, writing or math could compare to what Sean learned that day. Sean's tainted view of himself changed as he was able to experience his true nature, feel the significance of his existence and awaken to his preciousness. Learning based on interconnectedness, inclusiveness and wholeness strives to ensure that learners never forget what a beloved and essential part of the universe they are.

I claim no credit for Sean's awakening and transformation that day. I simply was a channel or the gateway to realizing his Divine Potential. I merely opened the door wherein Sean chose to enter and experience the fullness of his innermost beauty and sacred soul. No wonder it was Sean's BEST DAY! May this be the beginning of countless more to come.

Let your heart guide you. It whispers, so listen carefully.
Littlefoot's mother, Land Before Time

May you always know you are love, loved, loving and lovable beyond measure,
Namaste'
Adrian Reznik

Copyright © 2007 Adrian Reznik